Detox just to retox

So…i feel contemplative. It’s shocking, but yes—some neuron connections are present in the gray matter that is my mind. You can tell the Pixies that i’ve found mine and that i wish them luck searching. They’ve been searching for a couple of decades though, so i’m not too sure that their efforts will satisfyingly bear the fruits of their years of toiling labor.

That was an extremely dumb way to start off a long delayed blog entry.

Today i encountered the confusing, not very likable world of redox reactions in my Chemistry class. Chemistry can be fully invigorating at times, like when titrating or stoichiometrically converting moles of sodium hydroxide into grams of neutralized acid. Now that is mentally instigating and proper. Redox reactions are not. They are probably the most mundane, unbelievably mediocre reactions that one could ever study. Yes, i know that almost all reactions are redox reactions. Does that mean anything to me? Well, it does, but anyway, i simply don’t care for the likes of redox reactions. They are conceptually difficult to grasp. Here is the premise of these lame-as-Tamer reactions: something loses something and becomes oxidized, while something else gains the something that the first something lost and is therefore reduced. Not thrilling. At all. It’s inability to entertain is equivalent to DH Lawrence’s “Goose Fair.” i’ve read more inspiring Nutrition Facts. Anyway, the fact that these reactions fail to whip me into an impassioned frenzy of identifying reducing agents and quantifying oxidated compounds leaves me rather sad. i truly wish i could find such an activity enjoyable, but in all truth, i would rather eat Dinuguan than even think of processing anything involving those wicked little redox agents. They’re like Sauron in atomic form. That means that in my mortal state, i stand no match against them without the help of some hobbits, a wizard who is also Magneto, and a sexy swordsman who is romantically involved with the elfin version of Steve Tyler’s daughter. Unfortunately, i have no close connections with any of these, so i am basically doomed. Such is reality, my friends.

i’m afraid that redox reactions and i were truly not meant to be. We’re like Catherine and Edgar—as different as fire from ice. As for my Heathcliff…he is as fervent as a highly entropic reaction, as devastating as absolute Kelvin, as untameable as combustion, as scattered as the Tyndall Effect. Chemistry’s chemistry and i’m just me. We’re not Bingley and Bennett; we’re Chuck and Blair. We fight, we slip, we fall, but most of all, we move along.